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SHOW YOUR NICEST YOU
Imagine that you are answering an ad for a job. Wouldn’t you spend time to make the best resume that you can? And isn’t a date enough important to do the same?
If you don’t like the job that you find, it’s not so difficult to change to another one and all of us do so, but would you start a relationship with the idea that if it doesn’t go well you are going to switch to another one?
This is really serious, so assume it as a serious topic or you could come up hurt. A relationship is not as important as a job. It is more important than a job! It can be the more important decision in your whole life!
If you don’t want to include a picture in your profile because you want to have the maximum anonymity until the right time comes, it’s ok. But if you include a very nice picture of yourself it looks much better, and you still are almost anonymous. And if some of your friends find your picture on the web, and you are only being the you that they already know, then who cares?
But if you are shy or don’t like the idea of showing your picture, then don’t and it will be ok too, because if you find someone that you really like, and you feel that that could be the kind of person that you are looking for, you can always send your picture as an email attachment (only if that person agrees to send his picture too, if not it would be unfair)
CHOOSE THE BEST PICTURE
But when it comes to showing a picture of yourself, choose the nicest one, don’t send just any picture. (and it must be recent) If you don’t have one that you really like, look for professional help, you will be surprised of how impressive jobs they can do.
But having a professional take a picture of you is only one part of the task. What are you going to show in that picture? All of your body, or only your face? And what face are you going to show?
Stand up in front of the mirror and practice, until you find the expression that really shows your best side. I suppose that I don’t need to mention that you need to have a smiling face, but I mention it just in case.. Smiling lights up anyone’s face!
And what should you say about yourself. Don’t put the first words that come into your head. Take a paper and a pencil and start writing down fact things like your age, your height, your weight, etc.
Over this skeleton of profile, we will be adding more and more until you finally create an impressive profile, but before that, we’ll talk about some common pit falls that you must avoid.
ONLINE DATING PITFALLS
I’m sure you know that bragging is a major turnoff, so stat absolutely away from it. Even if you are incredibly good looking for many, you might not be so for that one you are talking to, so let the other person decide about it, be modest.
If you are openly asked about your look, you can be vague and say things like “I’m not a bad looker for many but I don’t know what you would think about it” or for some people I’m good looking and for some people I’m not.
Or you could be vague and fanny at the same time saying things like “my weight is placed on the right places”, or “I’m taller than most”, or “I can’t play basket”
If you can use humor, use it, because humor always acts as a turn on, humor sells!
Although above I told you to be modest, don’t be too modest!
I don’t say that you must start blowing your own trumpet, but you must state the facts.
In example if you like to sing and have a good voice, you can always say it without sounding too proud about it. The best way to do it is to say things like “my friends like how I sing” or “my friends like how I paint but I would like to hear what you say about it” etc.
You can also says things like:
“some of my friends appreciate how I cook”
“I’m pretty good cooking cakes”
“I’m not Picasso but I know how to paint”
If you are a talented person you don’t need to hide it, because many people appreciate to have a talented person as a partner.
There’s a question that sooner or later you will be confronted with and that question is: “what do you look like?”
This question is so stupid that I would like to answer it with a joke like “I have my father’s smile, my mother’s eyes, and I am as tall as my uncle” but to be honest you can’t answer that because what the other one is asking you is ” are you good looking?”
And you know that you can’t answer it being too modest or bragging, so as the question is not a direct one, you can give an answer that it’s also not direct like:
“I’m happy and fresh”
“I look like a bunch of roses”
“When people see me at the street, they rather walk towards me than away from me”
And if your might be partner insists on the point, give him a detailed explanation and let he or she decide if he of she like what they hear.
Try to sound interesting, do as you do before living your home for a date: try to look the best that you can and as impressive as possible.
Do not talk about details that might be of no interest to most.
When describing yourself and your life, you can make it interesting or boring, and no one likes to be bored, so write what you would like to say and show it to a good friend to ask for his/her opinion.
You won’t like a bore so try to not sound as one yourself.
Don’t use hackneyed phrases to describe yourself, because if you do, you will just sound as another face in the crowd.
No one looks exactly as you do (unless you have a twin), so don’t describe yourself as if you where, try to sound different and interesting.
Try to use as many smiles as you can and use comparisons when you can. Don’t say things like “my hair is black” say instead “my head has the color of a night without moon”, if you have red hair you could say “my hair has the color of the setting sun”
Always remember that beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder, so it’s up to you to convince the beholder that you are beauty, and if you are convincingly enough you will convince them because honest people are willing to believe what you tell them.
Don’t be confusing when you describe yourself, whether you like things or you don’t, be clear and don’t try too much to be different. Phrases like “I’m different” don’t sound well for many, and specially if you are talking about your appearance.
If you aren’t too pretty, you can always come with something like: “I’m appealing and interesting”
Be careful with phrases like “I don’t play by the rules” because it’s very easy to add a sexual innuendo to those expressions.
Yes it’s good to be different and original but if you sound too different you might scare many might be partners.
These are the most common pitfalls that you must avoid when you want to create a successful profile, a profile that really reflects you, in the best possible way!
Written by Dr. Roberto A. Bonomi
You will find all that you need to know about, self help, stress control, weight control, stop smoking, mind control, relax, motivation and meditation with subliminal messages at Dr. Bonomi’s web site: http://www.drbonomi.com
This article may be reprinted provided no changes are made and this resource box is included in full.